Arguments Can Be Productive!

Are You Being Too Agreeable for Love to Last? Most people reading this will not think it’s possible to have a partner that’s too agreeable. Anyone who has been in a relationship knows that two different personalities will eventually get on each other’s nerves. It’s a fact of life, when two people occupy the same

Are You Being Too Agreeable for Love to Last?

Most people reading this will not think it’s possible to have a partner
that’s too agreeable. Anyone who has been in a relationship knows that two
different personalities will eventually get on each other’s nerves. It’s a
fact of life, when two people occupy the same space, they will
occasionally overstep boundaries, hurt feelings, or simply make one
another madder than the hatter in Alice in Wonderland. The people you love
most often drive you the craziest.

Arguing, in these situations is a normal response. On occasion, there may
even be dish flinging, clothes throwing, knock down drag out kinds of
disagreements (often followed by mind-blowing making-up sessions). It’s
normal to fight. It’s even natural. What isn’t natural, in relationships,
is to always agree or never fight. Arguments are important tools in
relationships. They do more than just let off a little steam. Here are a
few reasons why you need to have the occasional argument in your
relationship.

Arguments Clear the Air

They are important tools for letting your partner know how you really
feel. IN relationships where couples never fight, it’s often the first
fight, the one that reveals all the pent up frustrations, hurt, and anger,
that result in the ending of that relationship. Arguments let the other
person know when how you feel, how you’re hurting, and what to avoid in
the future.

Arguments Show Engagement in the Relationship

They certainly bring an element of excitement into the relationship. They
let your partner know you’re there and hold nothing back. They show that
you are passionately involved in the relationship and that you do care.
They serve as a barometer for the level of affection in the relationship,
in many cases, and are important tools for your partner to understand how
vested in the relationship you really are.

Arguments Establish Important Issues for Both of You

We all know there are hot-button political and religious issues that
should not be discussed in polite society. The same holds true when it
comes to relationships. Those topics aren’t always as clearly defined as
religion and politics. In some relationships it’s cooking, mechanical
abilities (did anyone else notice how Jill on Home Improvement always
quietly called in a professional once Tim finished fixing things?),
family, friends, or even politics and religion.

Once you establish that these are hot topics for you by having that first
heated argument, you know to back off and avoid discussing the issue.
Sometimes, you must agree to disagree. But, if you never let your partner
know how you really feel and how important the issue is for you, then he
or she is likely to keep discussing it causing your blood to boil. Unless
you let your partner know how you feel, your partner is going to assume
you agree.

Don’t let your first fight be the final blow for your relationship. Learn
to speak up and let your partner know what you really think and feel. Most
important of all, learn to fight fair so that the disagreements and
arguments you do have are productive rather than destructive.

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