Will Cheating Help A Relationship?
Can Cheating Be Good for a Relationship? More often than not, the kneejerk reaction to this question is “No way!” At least, that’s the clean version of the reaction. However, there are times when cheating can be good for a marriage. This is the case, according to research conducted by Dr. Lucielle Ostertag from the
Can Cheating Be Good for a Relationship?
More often than not, the kneejerk reaction to this question is “No way!”
At least, that’s the clean version of the reaction. However, there are
times when cheating can be good for a marriage. This is the case,
according to research conducted by Dr. Lucielle Ostertag from the Italian
Institute of Social Sciences. Her study concluded that husbands and wives
who cheat on each other are more likely to remain married. She further
concluded, however, that long-term affairs, on the other hand, were
detrimental to the marriage.
Obviously, the theory raised in this study has been met with a great deal
of controversy. It goes against what we’ve been teaching in churches and
communities over the last few hundred years. However, if you look back
even further, the idea of one man for one woman is a relatively new
concept. In the early years of humankind, it was all about survival of the
species. In later years, as survival was far more assured, monogamy became
the prevailing philosophy and has been adopted by many religions and
cultures around the world ever since.
When Does Cheating Work?
According to Dr. Ostertag cheating works best when it’s done far from
home, is a short-lived fling, and when couples adopt a “don’t ask; don’t
tell” philosophy about their cheating. Some couples even plan for cheating
and establish ground rules so that it works for them.
How Can People Believe Cheating is Good?
Since the idea of cheating goes against the grain, it’s hard for many
people to understand why or how it could possibly be a good thing. The
problem with many marriages is that you do marry your best friend. You
love each other, but over time, the newness of it all, the sexual
excitement, waivers. Turning to a short-term alternative, allows a little
newness and excitement into the relationship without sacrificing the
emotional bond or love the husband and wife have for one another.
There is another way cheating can help make marriages stronger. That way
involves confirming that the grass is perfectly green within the marriage.
Sometimes, the affair serves to affirm the loving relationship you have at
Is Cheating Good for all Relationships?
Absolutely not! There are all kinds of relationships where this would
never work. Some people believe that there are certain vows that simple
should not be broken. Forsaking all others is one of those vows. There’s
nothing wrong with being unable to forgive infidelity or unable to accept
the idea that cheating could be good for marriage. Obviously, every
marriage is different. What may be good for one is not necessarily good
The take home from this should not be used to justify cheating. It’s meant
to show that it is possible to salvage your relationship, forgive, and
move on even if your spouse has cheated on you. It is possible to forgive
if that’s what you want to do. You’ll ultimately have to decide if you can
make the most out of it in an effort to build a better relationship in the